How to secure my vote in the coming election:
Canadian. Virgin. Islands.
I will vote for whichever party has the most feasible and socially-conscious party platform, providing they acquire a nice little island or two somewhere in the Tropic of Cancer for me to spend the rest of my Canadian days.
These islands must not be already inhabited by people. Because, let's face it, Canada has had a very bad history with its First Nations peoples, and there's no need to start that up again. Plus, colonialism is so 1803.
They should be deserted islands, or islands that are only populated by the families and/or harems of aging multi-millionaires. Once a millionaire dies, bam, we swoop in there and buy the place up. Maybe this would work better if the millionaires were estranged from their families and concubines. In any case, as long as I can live there and still get universal health care, and Tim Hortons, and retain my Canadian citizenship, andget the CBC not have to watch the CBC, I AM SOLD!
Think about it, which forward thinking Canadian would not want to live in the Canadian Virgin Islands? It will be warm and sunny, and we'd be surrounded by swimmable water. And likely way closer to Canada than other parts of Canada are to other nother parts of Canada in our current geological configuration. And as mentioned above, we will be able to retain all the most important benefits of being Canadian. ALL WHILE BEING WARM. ALL YEAR ROUND!
Note the caps lock. That means this is very serious.
Anyway, so Paul, Steve, Jack, and umm. . . the guy in charge of the Green Party -- Al? Bob? Jim? Insert all-purpose Anglo-Sax name here?-- get to work on acquirin' us some Virgin Islands, or even some Promiscuous Islands, and I promise you my vote on January 23rd. Mmkay?
~Anglo-Sax? I think I played that in stage band once
I will vote for whichever party has the most feasible and socially-conscious party platform, providing they acquire a nice little island or two somewhere in the Tropic of Cancer for me to spend the rest of my Canadian days.
These islands must not be already inhabited by people. Because, let's face it, Canada has had a very bad history with its First Nations peoples, and there's no need to start that up again. Plus, colonialism is so 1803.
They should be deserted islands, or islands that are only populated by the families and/or harems of aging multi-millionaires. Once a millionaire dies, bam, we swoop in there and buy the place up. Maybe this would work better if the millionaires were estranged from their families and concubines. In any case, as long as I can live there and still get universal health care, and Tim Hortons, and retain my Canadian citizenship, and
Think about it, which forward thinking Canadian would not want to live in the Canadian Virgin Islands? It will be warm and sunny, and we'd be surrounded by swimmable water. And likely way closer to Canada than other parts of Canada are to other nother parts of Canada in our current geological configuration. And as mentioned above, we will be able to retain all the most important benefits of being Canadian. ALL WHILE BEING WARM. ALL YEAR ROUND!
Note the caps lock. That means this is very serious.
Anyway, so Paul, Steve, Jack, and umm. . . the guy in charge of the Green Party -- Al? Bob? Jim? Insert all-purpose Anglo-Sax name here?-- get to work on acquirin' us some Virgin Islands, or even some Promiscuous Islands, and I promise you my vote on January 23rd. Mmkay?
~Anglo-Sax? I think I played that in stage band once
POSTED BY G. MANGO at 20:59
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